Harry Potter funny excerpts

Who is the most funny character in the Harry Potter series? Well... take a moment to take our poll on this!

Following is a list of some of the most funny excerpts from the books, just to help you make your mind!

Though we don't want to influence you, seeing the excerpts lets me bet on the two finalists!

  • Dudley had done the thing he was threatening to to do since age three: He had become wider than he was tall.
  • We tried to shut him in a pyramid, but Mum spotted us."
    George Weasley for his beloved brother
  • "Percy wouldn't recognize a joke if it danced naked in front of him wearing Dobby's tea cozy." -Ron
  • "What would we want to be prefects for?" Said George looking revolted at the very idea. "It'd take all the fun out of life."
    -George Weasley
  • Fred and George, however, found all this very funny. They went out of their way to march ahead of Harry down the corridors, shouting, "Make way for the Heir of Slytherin, seriously evil wizard coming through..."
  • George looked up in time to see Malfoy pretending to faint with terror again.
    "That little git," he said calmly. "He wasn't so cocky last night when the dementors were down our end of the train. Came running into our compartment, didn't he, Fred?"
  • "But we're not stupid -- we know we're called Gred and Forge." -George Weasley
    "Nearly wet himself," said Fred, with a contemptuous glance at Malfoy.
  • Mad-Eye Moody?" said George thoughtfully, spreading marmalade on his toast. "Isn't he that nutter--"
    "Your father thinks very highly of Mad-Eye Moody," said Mrs. Weasley sternly.
    "Yeah, well, Dad collects plugs, doesn't he?" said Fred quietly as Mrs. Weasley left the room. "Birds of a feather..."
  • "I want to fix that in my memory forever," said Ron, his closed and an uplifted expression on his face. "Draco Malfoy, the amazing bouncing ferret..."
  • Ron was staring at Pettigrew with the utmost revulsion.
    "I let you sleep in my bed!" he said.
  • "Ah, of course! There is no need to tell me any more, Ms. Granger. Which one of you will be dying this year?" -Prof. McGonagall
  • "So--after that obvious and disgusting bit of cheating--"
    "Jordan!" growled Professor McGonagall.
    "I mean, after that open and revolting foul--"
    "Jordan, I'm warning you--"
    "All right, all right. Flint nearly kills the Gryffindor Seeker, which could happen to anyone, I'm sure..."
    Lee Jordan as a commentator in the Gryffindor wersus Slytherin match.
  • There was Percy, jumping up and down like a maniac, all dignity forgotten.
  • "HARRY, THIS IS NO TIME TO BE A GENTLEMAN! KNOCK HER OFF HER BROOM IF YOU HAVE TO!"
    Oliver Wood
  • "Longbottom, if brains were gold you'd be poorer than Weasley, and that's saying something."
    Draco Malfoy







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